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One day I'm going to steal your life and trap it in a novel that makes me a fortune.


I'm entertaining a possibility that these predictions - any predictions like that are a diversionary tactic. The prediction says A, so you believe it but really everything is B. That way, when things aren't A as expected, you end up that little bit more screwed when they turn out to be B.

Its a great post though. I fully understand not making it to a 4th date.

PB Curtis

Fantastic post, thank you very much.

On a side note: I have yet to meet a woman who fails to claim oral sex "expertise". That would be understandable, if we were making woo, and I directly asked; they'd hardly announce that they gave crap head.

But I don't ask. I just get told, whether we are dating or not. None of this would be a problem if it was always true, which it sadly isn't.

So, do not rue too hard.


I want to know yours.

Surely it wasn't so bad.


Did her profile say anything about her being a sneaky bitch?


I think, Isabelle, that if this girl ran off never to be seen again it ay have been quite bad.
Was it bad?


It's left for the reader to work out.

Ask yourself, would you want the narrator of this story to be your boyfriend, given what you know about the way he thinks?



PB: Think about it. Would any sane man really REALLY tell a woman she gave crap head? I mean, she can always improve, right?


Ooh, naggingly intriguing, as ever.

... Has the writer worked it out?


PS (or indeed, PB) - What is this "crap head" people are talking about?


Hmmm. Sneaky indeed. If it said you have psychopathic tendencies then perhaps I'd run away as well. But otherwise... no problem. It's all a load of piffle anyway :)


Yes, I was backtracking, thinking I must have missed a bit here, but no, it's all left dangling. As was our OE, by the sounds of it.


sometimes its better to keep the neanderthal hidden...."he" has his time and place ......

Hmm, bad can be good sometimes plus I like a man who's honest, if not out loud, at least in his head.

So yes, I might.


I'd want to know, definitely. Its a nightmare trying to figure it out so any insight is welcome.

Same with the crap head thing, incidentally. I'd rather know I was doing something wrong so I could try and fix it. If the tables were turned and he was doing something wrong I'd tell him. Gently of course.


I never intended a specific answer.

My definition of science-fiction is "what if" meets "so what". The core of this story is "what if" we could easily find out such detailed, accurate information about each other and "so what" might it mean for human relationships.

The (selfish) male narrator see something he likes in the female character's DNA profile, but it doesn't occur to him that she might not like what she sees in his.

I deliberately didn't say what it was she didn't like - it could be one of the things we already know about (maybe she was a Salsa fanatic, or played Jazz?) or it could be something else. I suppose I was thinking the printout might say something like "He's only interested in you for the sex" but you can make up your own answer, it will still work.

The point of the story is that we all lie to each other and pretend we're things we're not, especially in the early days of relationships - do you REALLY want to know the whole truth?

...and I thought the "clever bit" in this post was the mobile lab being a converted burger van!

If you liked this, a post from August uses very similar themes:


Point taken but I still want to know the whole truth.

little Bird

Apparently there is no such thing as 'Crap Head'. Even if it's bad, it's good, or so I've been told, by someone trying to get me to give them it.

Personally, not being a fan of giving head, I think I'm bad. Don't need anyone to tell me that, and don't particularly want any practice to get better, thanks.

Like the post though OE, found you through the insignificant awards and think I'll be stopping by again.

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  • London, twisted. Media armageddon. Blurring of fact and science-fiction, not always deliberate. No, I'm not writing a book. Enjoy.


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